I’ve learned that, if you crowd enough people around and throw a few cameras into the mix, you can convince onlookers that they’re in the presence of a celebrity. The crowd will grow. People will stand around for great lengths, and for no apparent reason. I admit, I may have gotten caught up in a possible celebrity sighting once or twice. Although, after standing around for a few seconds, I quickly realized that no one was going to appear any time soon, and I kept moving. Why do we do it? They’re just people. Are we amazed that they jumped out of the TV and are now standing in front of us?
Personally, I’m glad my face isn’t world-famous. I enjoy blending into crowds and drinking my coffee in peace without being bombarded for autographs. Sure, if I was offered a celebrity-sized salary, I’d probably give it a try. You know, in the name of research.
Lately, I’ve noticed that society has become more and more ridiculous, especially in terms of “fashion”. I choose to believe that my growing older has allowed me to see the error in society’s ways and I have decided to list my top fashion grievances for your reading pleasure. Enjoy.
Grievance #1: Holy Shirts
I walked into a store the other day (a store that shall remain nameless because, full disclosure, I still really like to shop there) and I found a shirt for sale that was full of holes. I’ve seen stray sparklers creating a very similar effect. It’s a whole lot cheaper. Plus, you get the added bonus of not knowing whether the whole shirt is going to go up in flames. I remember when I got rid of my clothes once they started falling apart. Now, people are paying extra and calling it “distressed”. Man, I should’ve hung onto those old, ratty jeans. I could’ve made a killing. Probably.
Grievance #2: Sleeveless Shirts
I remember when cutting the sleeves off your t-shirts was the cool thing to do to. I’m not sure if it was to better display your muscles or just to make them look bigger. Now, people are willing to pay extra for stores to do it for them. Where’s the rebellion in that? Also, how does half a shirt cost more than a whole shirt? Do they really have to create a whole shirt just to cut the sleeves off? How hard is it to make a shirt without sleeves? Instead of making sleeves, you just don’t.
Grievance #3: Extremely Distressed Denim
I was willing to put the other grievances aside until I came across an article
about how designers are throwing perfectly good jeans to lions and tigers in order to attain the perfect “distressed” look. Feel free to read all about it here
. When I saw this, I thought to myself, “Really? Are people really willing to risk their lives for a, ‘Hey, cute top,’?” For those of you who read this article and thought this was a brilliant idea, I hope you realize that you’re pro training lions to hunger for human apparel in the name of fashion. Think about that.
Now, I’m all about the carefree, boho-chic style, but you have to draw the line somewhere. I’ve decided that this is it.
As a commuter, I spend a great deal of time in my car, and much of that time is spent in traffic. While I’m stopped in a sea of cars, I start to look around and observe the drivers around me. Although I’m often the one entertaining the cars around me with my musical performances, sometimes I happen to find people I just can’t look away from. Continue reading
As I’m sure you can already tell from my previous posts, I often sit and write at various coffee shops. I find the subtle background sounds mixed with the stimulating espresso makes for an inspirational environment. I also enjoy observing those around me. No, it’s not eavesdropping. I like to think of it as observing. I’m pretty much a self-proclaimed amateur Anthropologist. From my observations, I’ve picked up a few tricks of the trade that I thought I would share with you. Continue reading
I admire a man who can order a frappuccino with confidence. Although they’re often perceived as a less than manly beverage, they taste delicious. Men shouldn’t’ have to stick with black coffee to maintain their manly status in society. They should be able to order whatever delicious treat their heart desires. Too often do I see men hiding behind their girlfriends or sisters, having them order their whipped pink drinks for them. Although I have to admit, it’s pretty entertaining watching their drink exchange in the parking lot.